Tasertricks prompts
by karlaakamsloki
Summary: Random prompts given to me at Tumblr.
1. Zoo

Zoo

"Where are we going again?"

Darcy shook her head at Loki for the third time since she had persuaded him into getting in her car with the promise of McDonalds, why he loved those burgers so damn much Darcy didn't know but the boy was _obsessed_.

"I did not detect a lie when you told me we were going for Big Macs and yet we have passed fourteen McDonalds in ten minutes." Darcy shook her head again. Loki impatience grew. "Darcy speak."

"I wasn't lying, we are going to McDonalds. We're just going somewhere else first." Darcy refused to look at Loki, really the death glare he was probably throwing her wasn't worth the peek at his expression.

Stopping at a red light she waited for the inevitable meltdown, it happened every time she wanted him to try sometime new. She wanted him to experience all the amazing things Earth had to offer but Loki seemed hell bent on not getting anymore involve with Earth than he absolutely had to. He would sulk, yell, apologize for yelling, make it up to her by giving her amazing sex and then he would go right back to sulking.

So really no one was more surprise than her when he spoke.

"Oh? Are almost there yet?"

Darcy hid her shock by groaning at the question, knowing fully well all the where are goings? Were going to turn into are there yets? And they still had twenty more minutes to go.

Loki grew visibly more excited as they got closer to their destination and Darcy looked at him in question, he couldn't possibly know where they were going, it was a surprise she hadn't told anybody in fear they would let it slip and by they she meant Thor.

"You're too excited, you already know where we're going don't you?" Entering the parking lot in the zoo, she found a parking spot close enough to the main gates, thankful she had thought to come in a Tuesday morning when there was less people.

"Darcy I've been asking questions about Midgard's wild life for awhile now, I'm more than certain I have watched more animal planet than any other person in Midgard and I have tried to use as many words that sound like zoo as possible. Honestly I'm wondering what took you so long." That being said Loki practically jumped out the car and proceeded towards the ticket booth.

Darcy shook her head and let out a small giggle because really _God of Mischief _, she should have known.

Darcy wanted to say it all went smoothly from there, Loki had after all wanted to go to the zoo which meant he was trying to blend in, he looked like any other guy who was spending the day with his girlfriend.

In hindsight, Darcy should have known better.

It started pretty well. The birds flock to Loki and any passerby looked on in wonder as Loki commanded the birds to do his bidding, though Darcy wasn't amused when he made one of the birds steal her hat. Later they visited the Zebras and the Giraffes both which seemed terrified of him, Loki shrugged it off but Darcy knew he was upset. To make himself feel better Loki jumped in with the lions and wrestle them, Darcy didn't know which one was worse the fact he was wresting with Lions or the fact that the pretty cashmere sweater she had bought him was now in tatters.

It all went pretty much down hill from there.

Loki and Darcy had to high tailed it out of there when Loki tried to steal a green boa saying it was the most magnificent thing he had ever seen, the security guards didn't think so and had promptly chased them all the way back to her car.

Out of breath Darcy maneuvered the car out the parking lot quickly while Loki laughed in the passenger seat. Darcy threw him a death glare but he was laughing so hard he barely noticed.

"Darcy we should come to the zoo more often that was fun."

"I don't think so, I'm pretty sure they banned us."

"Oh well...We're still going to McDonalds right?"


	2. Shampoo

Shampoo

Let it be known that Darcy Lewis was not going to tolerate her boyfriend, God of mischief Loki Odinson, take her very expensive shampoo to clean his ridiculously long helmet.

Oh no, that bottle was six dollars and it wouldn't last her more than two weeks. She thought the rewards were good though, her hair was so silky and smooth and so she didn't complain about the price and really Loki shouldn't either he loved her long silky and smooth hair.

Really though the last thing she needed after coming back from Jane's lab to make sure the scientist was eating something besides stale coffee was to find her boyfriend, in the living room floor of all places, scrubbing away with a toothbrush at his golden helmet. What make her heart almost stop though was the almost empty bottle of her shampoo that she had bought _yesterday_.

"What in the fuck?!" Her eyes jump from the wet spot on her floor, to the almost empty bottle of her (did she mention expensive?) shampoo, to Loki who was soaked in his simple white t shirt and pajama bottoms. Any other day her legs would've buckle at the sight of Loki soaking wet but not today.

Loki barely gave her a glance before he went right back to his helmet.

"Ah I see you are home. How was work?" His nonchalance just made Darcy even more furious.

Before she could go and grab his helmet to beat him to a bloody pulp with it, she detour to the kitchen and roughly grabbed the first water bottle she saw in the fridge. Taking a couple deep breaths and headed back to the living room.

"Loki?" She stood as close as she could without touching the wet spot he had created on the floor.

"Yes Darling?" Oblivious, he just kept scrubbing away.

"I have a question, if you are a being of magic who can create things out of nothing and change clothes by mere thought...why oh why are you cleaning your helmet with a toothbrush and most importantly my _shampoo_?" The cold tone in her voice was suppose him, well, cold but Loki just kept scrubbing.

"Simple, cleaning my helmet is a ritual, the helmet is to be respected and making sure it is gleaming at all times is the uttermost sign of respect. I searched for the most suitable cleaning product in the house, you're shampoo was the best option."His tone: an adult to a child.

Without stopping to think Darcy headed to the bathroom grabbed Loki's bottle of shampoo, which was imported from Asgard and Darcy gathered made specially for Loki, and proceeded to the living room. Standing in from of Loki for a few seconds, she cleared her throat and when he noticed her standing there with a bottle of his shampoo, he froze.

He gave her a look and she gave him a look.

"Promise me you won't use my shampoo to clean your helmet again or this very special bottle of yours is going down the drain."

Loki nodded rage in his eyes, Darcy merely rolled her eyes at him and went back to the bathroom where stopping at the sink she proceeded to drain the bottle of Loki's shampoo anyway.

The cry of anguish from the living room merely made her drain the bottle faster.

"DARCY NO! THINK ABOUT MY HAIR!"


	3. Time Travel

Darcy is startled awake by the loud knock on her small apartment door, she sits up straight on her bed and rubs her eyes.

"Darcy."

Suddenly Loki's next to her bed and Darcy yelps in surprise before falling of the bed.

"motherfucker." She tries to get up but between being still half asleep and the pain on her right side from landing on it Darcy just gives up and stays there.

Loki having none of her silliness simply grabs both her arms and raises her to the bed.

Darcy whines at the mistreatment but groans softly when she lands back in the bed. Darcy lays there for a minute, eyes shut, and let's herself wake up because she knows Loki and he won't stop bothering her until he gets what he wants. As if on cue Loki starts poking her stomach and doesn't stop until she slaps his hand away.

"Are you five years old?" Sometimes Darcy sees Loki doing something amazing like explaining theories that have puzzled humans for centuries with nothing more than a dismissive hand gesture like in his opinion it should be common sense and she can almost see the all the years he's been alive, but then there are times like this one...

Darcy can almost feel Loki smirking and she opens her eyes to see him sitting beside her on her bed, finger still stretched in front of him as if to poke her again. Instead Loki grins and snaps his fingers and Darcy feels a tingle all over her body, when she looks down her sleeping attire which consists of a tank top and shorts is gone and replace by her favorite jeans and a long sleeved green shirt.

Darcy sits up straight again and touches her hair and realizes it's combed to perfection. Loki stands up from the bed and leaves the bedroom and Darcy wants to rub her eyes again but instead she groans and gets out of her bed, she spots her tennis shoes and puts them on. She stops briefly to pick up her phone and her house keys and she glances at the phone which reads four in the morning and Darcy curses Loki one more time.

When she opens her bedroom door ready to scream at Loki for not having coffee ready if he's going to wake her up this early she stops short when she spots him sitting down on her couch with another man.

They both turn around to look at her and the stranger smiles a huge smile (Darcy thinks no smile should be that big and not be creepy but the stranger makes it work.), He grabs her hand and shakes it before he introduces himself.

"Hello I'm the Doctor, you must be Darcy it's lovely to meet you. Loki talks about you all the time and he thought you might like to join us." Darcy almost takes a step back in shock but stops when she realizes he's still shaking her hand. He stops abruptly when he notices the shock on her face and with a grumble of 'right' walks back to Loki.

Darcy takes a moment to inspect him because when Loki talked about knowing a time lord who's time machine was a phone box she thought he was pulling her chain but apparently not and now Darcy is all confused because the Doctor is not what she expected. He wears a mismatched suit with a brown coat, dark pants, a light brown button down shirt and most surprisingly a red bow tie. Darcy wouldn't called him handsome except somehow he is even with a sharp face that looks a little too big for the rest of his body.

"Shall we?" Loki stands up from the couch and walks towards the door and the Doctor follows him in with a spring in his step. Darcy waits a second after they walk out of the door to take a deep stuttering breath before walking to meet them.

They're waiting for her outside of her apartment door and Loki takes her hand and squeezes it gently before following an excited Doctor to the elevator and out in the street where Darcy spots a blue box across the street, directly in front of her apartment building.

They cross the street and the Doctor stops in front of the blue box and leans his shoulder against it, he smiles softly at Darcy and points to the phone box.

"So Darcy Lewis where would you like to go first?"


	4. From Behind

Tumblr Prompt: From Behind giving to me by holyhiddlesbatman

Guys please be gentle, this is my first time writing smut.

* * *

He is on all fours.

The floor is cold and unyielding underneath him, he has been in this position for over an hour, he knows this because he can hear the tick tock of the clock, because he has been counting them.

His mistress made sure to give him something which would let him know how long his punishments are, the tick tock an agonizing reminder of his failures.

The blindfold over his eyes is rough against his delicate but durable skin and Loki can smell the scent of his mistress in the cloth, and he knows she did this on purpose, to tease him for she knows he loves her scent. She knows how much he loves to please her and nothing tastes as good as her pleasure.

His mistress told him once she would try to beat the prince out of him, the spoiled boy who tried to take over her realm, this has yet to happen but not a day goes by that his mistress does not try.

And he finds that every day he breaks a tiny bit more.

He is a God and the battles he has fought has brought greater pains than this but he is also hard and aching for relieve, he whimpers in need, in want of his mistress.

She chuckles from behind him and does not yield to his wants.

"My pet, you know not to complain. You deserve this, you know you do. You remember what you did, Don't you?"

Loki knows the question is rhetorical for he can not speak without the permission of his mistress lest he endures more punishment for disobedience.

"Look at my good pet, finally listening to his mistress. Maybe this deserves a reward?" He can hear her standing from her chair, the click of her heels telling him she is grabbing one of the toys from the nearby table.

He wants to moan in anticipation but any noise might stop his mistress, he holds his tongue and waits for her.

"Now I was thinking fifty lashes with my lovely Betty, you remember Betty don't you?" And he does, so vividly. The first hit against his skin nothing but a sting, the second sending a sharper pain far worse than the first until he realized the thing his mistress was hitting him with was nothing made of leather but something more harsh, something that even Thor would bed mercy for.

He sucks in a breath, his cock twitching in anticipation.

"What do you say my pet, you may speak."

"Please...please, please mistress." He lets out a gasping breath and the little giggle from behind him is music to his ears.

"Of course pet and don't forget to count." He won't forget, not this time not since the last time he forgot and his mistress was forced to punish him by stopping.

The first lash almost sends him crashing to the floor, his tired arms and legs nothing more than unbalance support beams.

But he does not forget to count.

"One."

He is more prepared for the second lash, the euphoria accompanying the pain bringing a smile to his lips.

"Two."

He had once told his mistress how much pain he could endure, that she had no need to hold back and his mistress had trusted him to be truthful.

"Ten."

The euphoria in his bones begins to increase but he is not there yet, he is still too far away from his release.

"Twenty six."

It is at times like this that he remembers meeting Darcy, the awkward mortal his brother had trusted him upon, he had not thought much of her. He never thought she could bring him this much pleasure.

"Thirty one."

Her approach had been subtle and he had amused her by providing her answers, but once she had him on the floor begging for mercy he had not find her as amusing.

"Forty three."

He had realized later that he loved her, realized that she was as much of an outcast as himself.

"Forty nine."

Awkward Darcy, who was now giving him something no one had ever given him before.

"Fifty."

He was crying, his body involuntary reaction to the pain but he did not care for his entire body is singing in pleasure.

His mistress must have decided not to give him a rest since the next he feels is a cooling touch on his abused ass, she spreads something cold and Loki frowns from the sting but she continues to smear the concoction until he feels her fingers probing at his entrance.

The first finger goes in easily, his mistress greatest pleasure is to destroy him from the inside out and taking him from behind is her favorite past time.

Before he knows it there are three small, delicate fingers inside of him and the discomfort from the intrusion is nothing compare to the overwhelming pleasure.

He does not hold back this time and he moans to his heart's content.

She retreats her fingers then and he whimpers in protest but a second later her hands are grasping his skin and he feels the hard, probing mass at his entrance and a scream of pleasure bubbles up in his throat.

His mistress pounds hard into him, undeterred by the way his tired arms finally give out on him and the way his shoulders and face crash into the now burning floor.

He can feel pain on his head but it only adds to his growing pleasure, he is so close now, he has been waiting for so long and he can feel it from the tip of his toes to the tip of his neglected cock.

His mistress grasps his cock and he knows he is done and the waves of pleasure crash into him and he continues to fall until he is no longer hard and his mistress still pounding into him, letting him ride the last of his pleasure.

He purrs when his mistress decides he is done and retreats from him.

"Alright we're done, you can let go now."

At her words he lets his legs fall to the floor uncaring he is now resting in his own seed.

He breaths for a long time and almost falls into a blissful sleep until Darcy puts her hands on his shoulders and proceeds to take off the blindfold, words of taking care him and how much she loves him falling from her lips.

She coaxes him into going to the bathroom with her and letting her put him in a tub of scolding hot water, he winces but after a few moments he adjust and smiles in contentment.

"I want you to always take me like that, it is most enjoyable." He murmurs sleepily against the side of the tube.

She rolls her eyes at him but there is amusement there and she is no longer wearing the cold leather her dom outfit consist of, she is regular pajama wearing Darcy now and Loki is always shock to realize how much people do not know about them, about her.

"Come on, let's take you to bed." She helps him from the tub and settles him into the bed before taking her place besides him.

Loki smiles happily against her shoulder before falling into blissful, satisfied sleep.


	5. braggadocio

Prompt: braggadocio by purpleaoi

* * *

"_So it's true?" Darcy doesn't believe him, no real reason she should but Loki looks cocky and smug and she wants to slap him for it._

"_Of course it is true, it was I who slayed a bigelsnipe during my coming of age hunt."_

"_By yourself?" Her skeptical tone made him raise an eyebrow but he nodded nevertheless._

"_Indeed, it was a most valiant kill."_

"_So then you wouldn't mind if I confirm with Thor?" She knows he's lying, he has to be but he doesn't lose his smug look and she frowns in annoyance._

"_Not at all."_

_When Thor confirms Loki's story with a proud smile she finds herself still skeptical but somewhat in awe of Loki._

* * *

She knew how they looked like, she saw a picture on the old norse book Erik kept. Big, scaly things that resemble a dragon with antlers more than anything else and way bigger than Darcy ever imagined.

It roars at her and she screams back in fear, it takes a step forward and by instinct she runs the other way, back towards the street that it's suddenly fill with this creatures from another planet.

She avoids hitting one of the bilgesnipe as it roars fire towards the sky, she stumbles into an alleyway and hiding behind a dumpster she watches as the sky fills with jets from the SHIELD base.

Her phone rings then and she scrambles to make sure none of the creatures hear it, she knows before she picks it up that is Loki thanks to his obnoxious ring tone.

"_Where are you?"_

He sounds worried and Darcy recalls telling him that she would be in this side of town.

"Hiding in an alleyway." She looks up when she hears something like a plane pass and realizes it's the quinjet, "And if you're in the quinjet than you're right on top of me."

"_Stay where you are, I will be there as soon as I am able."_

He hangs up before she can say anything else and she leans against the dirty wall while she waits for him.

The roars still come from the street but now they sound different and they are new sounds mixed in, gunfire and explosions.

The loud noises muffled the sound of Loki entering the alleyway but he's a tall guy and she spots him easily, he helps her stand up and motions for her to follow him but she stops him.

"Wait, you said you had done it before. Kill one of those things." Loki is giving her an impatient look and a second later the ground shakes beneath them and she stumbles into him.

"I want you to prove it. Go help the Avengers." The ground keeps on shaking and Loki tries to hold her closer but she swats him away.

"I am afraid it is not that simple." He tries to guide her to the alleyway's entrance but she plants her feet firmly on the ground and he's forced to stop.

"Why not? You said you could kill one of those things by yourself, so do it." She doesn't know what she's insisting so hard on it but she is and now Loki looks hesitant.

"I cannot." He pulls her arm again but he can't force her to go and Darcy has a bone to pick with him.

"Why not?"

"Do you not care you are in danger?" Loki looks exasperated and Darcy knows she's about to crack him.

"Why not Loki?"

"Because I lied!" He bares his teeth at her but it doesn't scare her instead she gives him a triumphant smile.

"Aha! I knew you were lying." Her moment of triumphant is short lived when his eyes darken with something resembling hurt.

"Yes, I apologize for not being more like Thor." He spits out his brother's name like it's a disease and Darcy winces.

"I never-" She's interrupted when Captain America strolls into the alleyway and tells them they need to get moving.

"Braggadocio." Darcy murmurs in amusement and Loki gives her a questioning look.

"Nothing I just found a word to add to the growing list I have of you."

Loki looks torn between asking her and getting out of danger but before Loki can ask, Darcy motions for them to follow Steve out.

The bilgesnipe are roaring less ferocious now and there is a hell less of them, nevertheless Darcy follows Loki's every instructions until they hit a barricade.

"I have to go." He leaves without a backwards glance and Darcy knows that even though Loki was that one that lied, she is the one that fucked up.

* * *

She lays on his bed, hands on her stomach staring numbly at the ceiling.

Jarvis was kind enough to let her into the tower even though her clearance level is pretty low, but she's grateful and she's not going to complain. Jarvis lets her know Loki is on his way up and she tenses, not knowing how he'll react to seeing her there.

"You cannot sneak on a god." Loki says as soon as he opens the door.

"I can try." He looks fine besides a cut on his jaw but it looks shallow and she knows it'll be gone in an hour.

"I wanted to apologize." Swallowing pride is never easy but Darcy is shock to see it's Loki that does it first.

"What?" She stumbles over the word, not quite believing he would want to apologize to her.

"In Asgard when you wish to court, it is always the biggest prey that attracts the most attention. That is to say of course, the strongest warrior often gets his pick of a bride." He gives a half smile before laying down next to her, armor and all.

"You knew I wished to court you, I forget often times that we are not in Asgard anymore and our traditions and yours are quite different...I was trying to impress you, when I was a boy I was taught to make sure my intended knew I could provide for her. Feed her and our future children, they are important traditions in Asgard and I was not able to let them go when I became interested in you."

She stares at the ceiling as he talks and she can't help but wonder what else Loki had to prove to even get someone interested in him.

"I did not actually kill a bilgesnipe on my own...but the entirety of Asgard believes so. It was quite easy you see, to enchant a fallen tree to look like the carcass of the creature. My Father knew of course but he decided to keep my secret for whatever reason and then the warriors started to give me acceptance and I started to believe the lie myself." He trails off in a whisper and Darcy turns to look at him.

"I don't want Thor, if I wanted Thor I would've fought Jane for him." She puts her hand over his and squeezes. "I just want Loki."

Loki gives her a small but grateful smile and she finally decides to change to later topics.

"Now what else would you have to do to court me?"


	6. Hats

"Can I try on your helmet?"

He looks up from his midgardian papers, even though he will not admit it to another soul the writing and equations give him problems so much so at times that he needs to fully concentrate on them forgetting everything around him, and because of this the mortal woman known as Darcy catches him by surprise.

"I beg your pardon?" He frowns up at her, letting the pencil drop from his hand.

"The horns?" She imitates their shape with her hands, a crude imitation of how they are suppose to curve from his head and Loki's frown deepens.

"I do not see why you would want to try it. Mayhaps you can ask my idiotic brother to let you borrow his feathers." He waves her off, impatient to get back to this thing humans called physics.

"No, please I really want to try yours. It's so cool, it's way cooler than feathers. Please Loki, please?" Loki looks up again at the mention of the word cool because according to the mortals this means they like the things define as 'cool'.

She gives him a pleading look, hands clasped in front of her and bottom lip sticking out in a pout.

"If I do this, you will let me be?" He will not admit he is a little taken back with her insistence, and a little terrified of what she will do if he does not give in. He has heard from his brother about the mortal weapon known as a 'taser' and anything that makes his brother cringe should be hesitated upon.

"Yeah, promise I won't bother you again." Loki knows she does not mean it for she will be back later to ask for something else.

"Very well." He waves his hand and his helmet appears on his work table, crushing the pencil underneath it.

Darcy's eyes widen and she hesitantly puts her hands on the helmet, feeling its texture and its smoothness. Loki leans back on his chair and lets her play with his helmet feeling aware of the prickly of apprehension at the back of his head, no one touches his helmet, much less so wears it besides himself and this feels like a violation of his regalia.

She attempts to pick it up, slowly but surely she raises it to her head and puts it on.

"It's heavy, way heavy." She sways for a moment trying to get her bearings, Loki watches in amusement as she takes out the thing midgardians proclaim as a iPod and attempts to take a picture of herself.

"Damn." She murmurs, fumbling with her iPod and trying to get an angle.

Her spectacles are askew and she did not take off her hat from her head before putting on his helmet and he can see the tint of pink on her cheeks from the heat, the helmet is hot enough on its own without adding something underneath it. She is still trying to take a picture as she stumbles with the weight of the helmet and she absolutely looks a sight and Loki cannot help but laugh.

"Instead of laughing, you should be helping me." She complains with a whine and Loki stands up and snatches the electronic device from her hand.

After telling him what to press and making a few poses, one including something midgardians called a peace sign which Loki immediately shut down since his helmet was for battle and not to symbolize peace, Loki finally snapped a picture he deemed acceptable enough and returned the device to her.

"Thanks dude, this is super cool. I'm totally making it into my facebook picture." She pocketed the device and attempted to take off the helmet, but it seemed her wool hat was tangled with his helmet and she seemed to hesitate by pulling it.

Feeling helpful, Loki waved his hand again making his helmet appear in the table once again though this time with an addition.

"Oh no." Darcy whispered while Loki removed the knitted wool hat from his helmet.

There appeared to be no damage to the wool hat but Darcy snatched it out of his hands and inspected it with the precision of a spell master.

"It seems okay." Saying so she put it back on her head and Loki stared confusedly at her.

In his head he tried to remember a time where she was not wearing a hat or her spectacles, he knew she did but so far he had only caught glimpses of her without both of the items and it started to unnerve him how he had never seen her on her own without something obstructing his view.

"Tell me, do you always wear such insignificant items? I would rather think you would only wear them when necessary." He knew she could see from afar and therefore she did not near to wear them all the time, at least this what Thor's little mortal lover had said and Loki knew if he had a choice he would never wear something unless completely necessary.

Especially hideous things like spectacles.

Darcy frowned at him before turning on her heel and leaving his small, compact office.

Loki naturally follow behind her.

"I wish not to offend but curiosity is a weakness of mine." And one of his greatest strengths, Loki wanted to add but refrain to let Darcy set the pace of the conversation.

"It's important, they're all important." She huffed as she kept on walking towards the room given to her for her temporary quarters.

Loki always felt claustrophobic in the small, confined building. He was not allowed to leave it unless it was with his brother and the sometimes scorching heat of the desert did not stop at the building's doors and it hurt to know this was his punishment.

The caged bird, who could still sing but could not leave.

"All?" He asked as he stop in the entrance of her room.

Darcy did not answer him but instead she pulled two medium size wooden boxes from underneath her bed, and set them both on her small bed and opened them.

Loki could see from the doorway the millions of colors in the boxes and he stepped closer, stopping when he realized what all the colors were.

"How many do you have?" He asked her, still entranced by all the knitted hats in the boxes.

"I don't know but they're important." She kneeled on the floor in front of the boxes and grabbed as many as she could before she settled on the floor, she motioned him to do the same and Loki hesitantly did so.

She took off the one on her head and added it to the pile between them.

"All right, pick one."

Loki gave her a quirk of an eyebrow in question but did as told and randomly selected a hat from the pile, a blue and yellow thing that Loki thought was quite hideous.

Darcy nodded her head at his choice and took from him and put it on.

"I got this when I turned twelve, my mom had made Sheppard's pie and my grandpa presented me with it when I blew my birthday candles. I still remember the taste of the pie, my mom was always a good cook." She gave him a sad smile before taking off the hat and dropped it next her, away from the pile.

Loki looked at the pile again and picked up a lavender hat, small and with tiny white hearts around the edges.

"My third birthday, I don't remember obviously but there are tons of pictures with me wearing this thing. Apparently I really liked purple back then." She took it from him and took a deep breath of it and smiled.

"I do not understand." Loki was pondering the whole point in this exercise, unsure of what Darcy was trying to tell him except of course that she had a hat for every occasion.

Darcy sighed and grabbed a pink and white knitted hat, too small to even fit on a fist of her hand.

"My grandpa gave this to my mom to give to my dad when she found out she was pregnant with me, she wrapped it and gave it to my dad on thanksgiving day. Dad always said it the most special thanksgiving ever. I got one of these every time something happened in my life, when I was born, when I started kindergarten, when I got appendicitis, when I graduated high school. For as long as I remember I've always had a hat on my head. I don't have a picture without them."

"Special then." Loki concluded with a nod of his head.

"Yeah, you know what a security blanket is?" Darcy asked still holding the pink and white hat.

"I am unfamiliar with the term." Though the term was peculiar, soft cloth used as security?

"Is a term for something that makes you feel safe, something that when you think about or when hold it makes you remember better times and it makes you feel like you're home. My grandpa loved to knit, grandma never got the taste for it, my family has always been a little weird but anyway." She stops for a second trying to get her bearings and Loki sits in wait for he knows how hard opening up to someone can be. "He would knit everything he could, hats, scarfs, even purses. Every time something bad happened to me, my grandpa would be there with a kind word and a new hat."

Her breath stutters and Loki picks up another hat, a completely blue one, to give her time to settle before she continues.

"It was my first year of college and it was my first time away from home...and then I got a phone call telling me my parents and my grandpa had been in an accident, it was a horrible time for me and everything sucked and I just... the next day I got a package, right before I left for the airport and it from a couple days earlier. It was a hat, this gorgeous green and gold knitted hat and it was from my grandpa, it should have made it hurt more but it help, it helped so much and ever since then I always wear my hats, he even taught me how to knit. It was great skill to have in life, or so he told me." She swipes at her cheeks, trying to get rid of her tears and Loki feels a sliver of sympathy for this mortal girl, who did not have to open up to him but did anyway.

"You know what." She stands up and looks through the boxes again, a triumphant smile on her face when she finally finds the hat she is looking for.

"You can have it if you want." It's the green and gold hat she talked about in her story and Loki finds the sentiment of it chokes him.

She does not let him answer and instead puts the hat on his head and Loki tilts his head in help.

"Looks good." She murmurs, still arranging the hat on his head. "Maybe I'll make you a scarf to go with it."

She knew of his love of scarfs and the offer made him smile in gratitude because most of mortals hated him and compassion was not shown to him, not even in his rare outings in the small town.

Darcy stepped back from him and Loki stood up to look at himself in the small mirror Darcy kept hanging by her door.

"It looks presentable." Loki told her teasingly and she smacked his arm for the sass.

"Here put this on." She handed her spectacles and Loki put them on, his vision was blurry but he could see well enough from the corner of his eye.

"There now you look like a hipster. I feel like I should bring you Starbucks or something." Darcy giggled and Loki gave a chuckle of amusement as well because the skinny black jeans and tight blue shirt that had been given to him in the beginning of his stay were most certainly not his style but they suited him somehow, so much so that Darcy had ranted and shown him pictures of the mortals known as 'hipsters'.

"What are you two doing?"

Neither had heard the returned of Thor and Jane, and they both startled at Jane's presence on the doorway.

Darcy snorted before she started to laugh hysterically and Loki could only take off the hat and spectacles in horror, he shoved them at Darcy before giving his brother's lover a threatening glare that made her move away from the doorway letting him escape.

"Brother what is-" Thor started talking as soon as he saw him but Loki waved him off before retreating back to his tiny office.

Embarrassment burned his cheeks and he neglected to hear how Darcy had follow behind him.

She dropped the hat next to his helmet and give him a soft smile.

"Keep it, I'll make you a scarf. And I really just want to say thank you for hearing me out, not a lot people have the patience to."

Loki nodded tensely and Darcy sighed before leaving.

He fingered the soft cloth and then waved it away with his helmet, sending them somewhere safe.

As he threw away the pencil and got a new one, his thought circle back to Darcy and an honest smile blossomed in his face.

He hoped she had not been jesting him about making him a scarf.


	7. Roommates

I'm posting this with the rest of the prompts since it is a prompt but it's 6k words long so it's technically one shot.

Hellion-Kat prompted: uhhh…just putting it out there but maybe something meme based between loki/darcy or steve/darcy? Darcy rick rolls Loki's plans to take over the world Or Darcy teaches Steve about internet memes?

* * *

"_You have reached my number, please make sure to leave your message after the beep."_

"_Jane, I need you to pick up the phone...I'm covered in green goo and I think I broke something. And-and Loki, fuck I think Loki is on fire... no wait shit scratch that Loki _is_ on fire. So yeah get back to me... or get the Avengers or something. Okay thanks bye"_

* * *

"Come on Jane, you promise you were going to show me New York."

"Darcy I have to get this equations ready. I promise we'll go tomorrow okay?" Jane told her distractedly while she took measurements and readings from her laptop.

"But I'm only here for a few more days before I have to go back home, please Jane?" Darcy wasn't ashamed to say she was whining because she had spent money on this trip and had faith Jane would hold up her end of the deal, but apparently Jane was too busy to even see sunlight and what else was new really?

Jane shook her head and Darcy raised her arms in exasperation before stomping out of Jane's lab.

Just before she left the SHIELD building, she saw her iPod stealer coming towards her and Darcy was more than a little surprise to see him.

"Miss Lewis. Before I ask how you managed to get into a facility where the maintenance crew needs three different sets of keys to get into the elevator, let me just clarify that I did not in fact steal your iPod and I hope this persuades you to stop emailing me." Coulson stood stock still in front of her and Darcy leaned back in defiance.

"Okay first of all your system isn't as good as you think it is, second you did steal my iPod because I don't have my iPod, I haven't it seen it since Puente Antiguo so excuse me if I don't believe you and I won't stop sending you clips of the avengers parody porn videos until you return it." She poked him on the chest before stepping around him and leaving the SHIELD building.

She took a deep breath of smog filled air before she started walking in a random direction.

It was just after six when she started to think about going back to apologize to Jane, she made her way back until she realized she was lost but the sun was still out and any case she could take a taxi back.

Darcy wasn't clumsy, she never really fell as a child and as luck would have it she succeeded in heels, but she was unobservant.

Through out her life, Darcy had more than one embarrassing moment thanks to her lack of noticing things, these included missing obvious signs of her boyfriend using her as a beard, the one time she had arranged a study session with her math teacher only to realize he thought she was going to sleep with him to raise her grade, among many others.

So really she wasn't surprise when she missed the yellow warning tape and signs because she was looking at a store across the street.

Darcy did notice the gaping hole after she stumbled into the warning sign but that was only because she fell through it.

The first thing she felt was wet but the second, and really the important thing, was pain.

"Oh fuck, what the fuck. Who put that hole there?!" She tried to move only to feel a shot of pain shoot through her left arm.

She heard a scream coming from somewhere but her hair was on her face and her glasses were MIA, she was sure she wouldn't even be able to see her hand if she tried, which she really needed to do with the pain shooting up her arm.

"WHAT HAVE YOU DONE?!"

Darcy wasn't the smartest girl in the world but it didn't take a genius to know she stumbled on something she wasn't suppose to.

She swiped her face with the sleeve of her uninjured arm, the only part of her body not covered in something sickly green, and focused on the figure in front of her.

He was kneeling on the dirty floor over a crack, hands on top of it as if trying to hold it together.

"Wait, I know you. You're Thor's brother." It took her a moment to realize what she had just said but once she did she cursed herself and her luck.

The whole invasion thing had been strictly need to know basis but with her self giving clearance she knew more than she needed.

Like the fact Loki was trying to take over the world and killing anyone who stood in his way.

"I am not his brother and you would do well to-" He didn't get to finish because the crack opened wider and fire shot through it.

Loki yelled before stumbling away from the crack, which was still shooting fire.

Darcy struggled with her good arm to take out her phone from her pocket, she faintly saw Loki returning to the crack, an enraged look on his face.

She held the phone away from her face as she tried to make sense of the of the touch screen display, it took her a few fumbling minutes before she was able to get to Jane's number.

She didn't remember leaving a message but she was pretty sure she did, before passing out she spied a green and black figure covered in fire.

* * *

She woke with a start, disoriented and a little loopy.

"Hey Darce, it's okay. You're in the medical wing of SHIELD." Jane's voice was coming from her left side and when she attempted to turn her entire arm complained with pain.

"What the fuck happened?" Her memories were still fuzzy and she tried to move her good hand to rub her face only to have yanked back.

"What the fuck? Why am I handcuffed to the bed?!" She looked down and inspected her body, almost everything was covered by a blanket but she could move her feet freely which meant she was only handcuffed with her hands, well one hand since she could feel something on the other which meant she was on a sling.

"Give me my glasses." She heard Jane grabbed something and the next thing she knew she could see her arm.

The sling was blue but her arm wasn't in a cast which was good news, she moved her arm tentatively and noticed that the discomfort wasn't huge but it did hurt and she resigned herself to not having her arm for awhile.

"Darcy." Jane's voice was timid, hesitant. "Listen do you remember what happened?"

"Sort of, it's coming back to me now." Which she actually didn't know if she was glad for.

"Good, listen about the handcuffs...Agent Coulson thought maybe they were appropriate because-"

"Because you're under arrest." Coulson had somehow slipped into the room without her noticing and Darcy gave a short cry of protest.

"What? Why?" She looked at Jane but the scientist was staring worriedly at the back of Coulson, Darcy turned and realize there was a white sheet separating the room. She frowned when she realized how big the room was.

"You hacked into one of the most secure networks in the world. I don't know whether to recruit you or send you to jail." Coulson's bottom lip twitched slightly, and Darcy sent him a scowl.

"How about neither?" The pain on her arm was getting annoying and she wanted some relieve though she wasn't about to ask the iPod stealer for them.

Before she could protest her unfair treatment, they heard a door opening and closing loudly.

No one came to her side of the room though and the other side was quiet.

"Who's my roommate?"

"Well see that's the thing Darce, technically both of you are getting arrested and you're both injured so it seemed natural to put you in the same place." Jane bit her bottom lip and Darcy narrowed her eyes in suspicion.

"Who is it Jane?" Before Jane could answer though, the sheet was pushed back to reveal a sheepish Thor and a bed bound Loki.

"No, fuck no."

"Lady Darcy _please_." Thor looked tired beyond belief and Darcy stopped her renew struggling to look at him. Thor sunshine comes up my ass Odinson was pleading with her and Darcy turned her eyes to a furious looking Loki, who was thankfully muzzled and unable to defend himself.

She couldn't see how badly hurt Loki was because every single inch of him was covered up, either by blankets or gauze, his face was the only place she could see and what she could see was filled with tiny cuts.

"You look like shit." Not very eloquent but it did make her feel better.

There a beat of silence before Jane exhaled and put a hand on her injured shoulder, the touch was soft and soothing and Darcy was thankful for the small assurance.

"Everything will be okay Darcy, I promise."

* * *

They were going to be babysat by the the Avengers.

Loki's muzzle was gone but he still wasn't talking and both his hands and feet were bound to the bed, her restrain was gone too but every time she tried to stand up her legs felt like noodles and she sank back to the bed in misery.

Since Loki wasn't complaining or doing anything else, she took control of the remote and proceeded to watch whatever trash was on the crappy cable from SHIELD, though she was surprised they didn't have a more premium service being secret agents and all.

The first couple of days were a trial by error, most errors involved her seeing as her roommate couldn't even lift a finger without raising an alarm. The first thing she did was asked for her clothes because she could feel a breeze every time she stood up and that was not okay, the last thing she wanted was for a super villain to see her ass though instead Jane brought her new underwear and pajamas.

She wasn't allowed to have her stuff because she was a prisoner and that wouldn't be okay, it hurt not to roll her eyes every time someone told her that.

Loki slept most often then not but when he wasn't sleeping he would join her on watching tv, she was kind of fascinated by all the little noises he made when he was trying to convey emotions. He would grunt for displeasure and sigh for contentment and if Darcy hadn't heard him making the nurses cry she would think he was cat.

A good looking cat who tried to take over the world.

Which was probably why they were watching a re-run of Sabrina the teenage witch when Tony Stark came in.

"Reindeer games, wannabe Stark." He was dressed in jeans and a band shirt, while carrying a briefcase.

"Wannabe Stark?" Darcy questioned, not looking away from Sabrina.

She thought she should be more impressed with the billionaire but Jane talked about them often enough that they didn't appeared greater than life to her anymore, especially when you hear Hawkeye farted on Bruce's face to see if he would hulk out.

He did, the ensuing chaos was televised and hilarious.

"I'm the original SHIELD hacker, no one better than me." Tony puffed up his chest before dragging a chair between the beds and sitting down.

"I know what's better than you." Darcy told him seriously.

"Oh yeah? What's that?"

"Your wifi." She deadpanned before looking back at the show.

"True, True." Tony kicked the briefcase under her bed and Darcy sat up and tried to bent down to take it but Tony put a hand on her uninjured shoulder and brought her back up.

"No chance, no touching daddy's stuff."

Darcy pouted but didn't try again.

"How's Rock of Ages over here, any better?" Tony said conversationally, Loki didn't bat an eyelash and instead focus on Sabrina.

"This morning he made a doctor cry when he came in to check on his vitals, an hour ago he tricked a nurse into thinking it was tomorrow and she had slept an entire day."

"So good then?"

"Yep."

Sabrina ended and Tony stole the remote, ignoring her protest and changing the channel to the big bang theory.

"Science?" She asked teasingly.

"Science." Tony confirmed putting his hands behind his head.

"How did you hack into SHIELD?" Tony asked during a commercial break and Darcy gave him a wink and shake of her head.

"Fine, don't tell me. I did it first anyway." Tony gave a nonchalant shrug of his shoulders and went back to watching the show.

"That's not fair, I mean you have what? Thirty years on me?"

Tony looked scandalized for a second before crossing his arms and staring at the tv.

"Stark, shut up otherwise get out." Both Darcy and Tony turned to look at Loki, a little shock written on both their faces.

"I created a hacker program and I installed it in Jane's phone before she left, it works like a virus. Once she hooked herself to the wifi in the SHIELD building I was able to get in...all the way from New Mexico." Darcy confessed since they were all sharing, apparently.

"That's brilliant, if SHIELD doesn't recruit you I want you to come work for me." Tony blurted rapidly, grabbing a device from his front pocket and handing it to her.

"Here, the latest Starkphone prototype. Let's call it a little gift for my future employee."

Darcy inspected the phone and realized that even though it was small she could do a little damage with it, she gave Tony a big smile and shook his hand before they went back to watch the show.

* * *

Unfortunately their next babysitter wasn't as much fun as Tony.

Natasha Romanoff walked in with a grace of a dancer and the smile of a spy, which she kind of was.

She sat in the chair Tony had left behind before snatching the remote from Darcy's bedside table.

Darcy and Loki made similar sounds of displeasure when they realized Natasha was changing the channel to lifetime. Darcy was a girl, she made no claim not to be and she liked crappy reality shows as much as anyone else but even she had a limit and watching dance moms was too much.

Especially when she and Loki we're missing a new episode of Ellen.

"If you concede control of the device to Darcy, I will tell you one embarrassing tale regarding my brother."

Loki looked like he was in physical pain and Darcy winced because Loki's only experience with dance moms was when she had finally decided to take a shower on her own leaving him with no choice but to watch it, she had been in there for over an hour and she had left the channel on lifetime after watching an episode of project runaway while Loki slept.

"Three." Natasha bargained.

"Two." Loki retaliated and Darcy felt she could slice the tension with a knife.

Natasha stared at Loki for a second before nodding her head and giving the remote back to Darcy.

"Darcy, kindly change the channel to say yes to the dress." Loki told her and Darcy was surprised but changed the channel anyway, mourning the lost of Ellen.

It didn't take long to know why Loki had asked her to change the channel, the spy between them tensed and her eye started twitching but she was stubbornly staring at the tv.

"Oh I like this." Loki chuckled and Darcy felt a shiver of fear going through her spine, even though it wasn't directed at her.

"Tell me about your brother." Natasha insisted and Loki sighed dramatically before giving in.

"We were nothing more than toddlers the first time Thor forgot his undergarments, horribly it would not be the last..."

* * *

"I was going to take over the world."

Darcy had been dozing off after Natasha had finally left, tired of holding the civil end of the conversation while Natasha and Loki had tried to kill each other with their eyes, but she jerked awake at Loki's words.

"What?" She rubbed her face with her good hand and stared at the ceiling, lamenting not being able to sleep face down.

"I was going to call forth the powerful creature which resides below Midgard's crust, it is said to be made of pure fire, but then you stumbled on the offering I had created for it and I had no choice but to stop it." He motioned to his body and sighed in resignation.

"In this on going war, it was going to be my most powerful weapon." Loki said sorrowfully before turning away from her.

Darcy opened her mouth to apologize but then she realized she shouldn't, Loki was trying to take over her world and slaved humanity and fuck she was not apologizing for doing something good.

"You're blue." She said instead, hitting herself on the face after she heard herself talking.

"You mock me?" He told her angrily.

"No, just stating a fact. You're blue which is the reason we're all in this entire mess. There's nothing wrong with being blue, I mean have you seen some of the people here? People will do all sort of crazy shit to look different. There's seven billion of us and we all want to believe we're special so we change the way we look to make sure we do become different."

Loki still wouldn't look at her and Darcy admitted defeat by turning her head away and closing her eyes.

* * *

Their next babysitter was the Hulk, or more accurately his alter ego Bruce Banner.

He arrived earlier than Tony and Natasha had, instead of coming early in the afternoon he had opted for early in the morning.

Darcy had been surprised when she saw him come in, the tasteless mess of eggs and ketchup in her mouth forgotten as he moved the chair from the middle of the beds to Darcy's side, away from Loki.

The nurse had been changing Loki's saline bag, seeing as the god refused to eat 'the disgusting midgardian food', when Bruce had come in but Loki tensed and had not been for his restraints, Darcy thought he would have bolted from the room.

Darcy continued to eat in silence, switching between looking at a tense Loki and a relaxed looking Bruce.

Bruce had been carrying papers with him when he came in and he focused on them for most of the morning, ignoring the tv and the small chatter between Darcy and her room companion.

"Listen whatever they tell you, no one is better than Spike. Fucking no one." Darcy was glad Loki was ignoring their previous stupid conversation in favor of discussing Buffy.

"I do not understand, there is no character named Spike." Loki frowned in confusion.

"Not yet, this just the first season but it's never too early to start loving Spike."

The re-run of the Buffy episode ended and Darcy flipped channels until she came across the opening sequence of Megamind.

She left it there until Loki asked what it was about and she was forced to talk.

"It's about an a blue alien trying to take over the world." She told him sharply and to her surprise she heard a muffled laugh coming from Bruce.

"I do no think it wise-"

"I don't care what you think wise, I love Megamind he's an awesome dude and you might even learn something, so shut up and watch it."

The next two hours were spent with a grumpy Loki, but Darcy was beyond caring and no one was not letting her watch Megamind.

She had developed a crush on Megamind the first time she had watched the movie, never mind he was a blue cartoon but she loved his transformation into a good person who didn't change but instead adapted to his surroundings.

She never thought she would meet an actual blue alien one day, one with shape shifting abilities who wanted to take over the world and was misunderstood because that was exactly what Darcy was noticing with Loki.

The guy absorbed everything like a sponge, which included emotions. He didn't react well to negative emotions and he glowed under good ones, in the few times Thor had been by he had been stiff and impolite but receptive with a hungry look on his eyes. Thor had been turned away every time he was by but Loki always looked a little sad afterward, and he always demanded they watch comedy central to make himself feel better.

Not that he would actually tell her that.

"I'm Darcy by the way." Darcy turned to Bruce once the movie was over and the silence became oppressing.

"I'm aware, they told us at the briefing." Bruce continued to shift through his papers and Darcy was none to please to hear about the debriefing.

"That's not cool, it's not like I'm some sort of criminal master mind or anything." Her biggest fault was knowing how to use computers.

Bruce shrugged, not looking away from his papers.

On her other side Loki was still staring intensely at the tv, which was now playing a re-run of Nip Tuck.

"You know the Smurfs?" Darcy asked Loki conversationally.

"I am unfamiliar."

"They're this village of little blue men and kids love them." She pulled out the phone Tony had given her, ignoring the now very interested Bruce, and tapped it until the tv was hacked.

She could have kissed Tony for giving the wifi she teased him with because now she could show Loki about the little blue men.

"Show him blue man." Bruce told her distractedly.

"Blue man? The band?" Darcy questioned him after the first Smurfs episode started playing.

"They're a good band." He insisted, looking stubbornly at his papers.

"Sure, if you say so."

Loki watched the first episode in silence and then Darcy switched to blue man youtube videos.

Darcy was looking for one specific song when Loki spoke.

"So being blue in Midgard is, as you would say, cool?" Loki asked while she debated whether to show him the entire Daft Punk Interstellar videos.

"Well yeah, if you want to _pun_ it that way." She laughed while raising her hand to high five Bruce, who merely gave her a glance before going back to his papers.

"Whatever, Tony would have high five me." She pouted while the intro music to I'm Blue started playing from the tv.

* * *

Darcy didn't get to anticipate their next babysitter Avenger because Loki had gone off his meds.

Literally.

Turned out the 'saline' was actually Fentanyl, a drug a hundred times more powerful than morphine, and the reason Loki had been somewhat docile for most of his stay, which made Darcy very worried since Loki had been making the medical staff cry since he got there, Loki off his meds was trouble.

When Clint Barton, aka Hawkeye, walked in she had been busy arguing with Loki about his bed.

"Do not dare me mortal."

"No, you're not allowed to burn the bed dammit."

"It is uncomfortable and unnecessary."

"A bed is never unnecessary and hadn't you had enough fire already?"

"Wow, if you two need a second I can leave." Clint raised his hands in surrendered and Darcy rolled her eyes before gesturing him in.

"Ah the Hawk, how is my little servant?" Loki purred and Clint's shoulders tensed but he kept walking until he reached the chair on the side of Darcy's bed.

"Is that typical behavior?" Clint gave her a pointed look that told her to explain.

"No, they took him off his meds today, the doctors told me they needed to take him out of the pain medication because he was becoming dependent, and really what's worse than Loki trying to take over the world? A drug addict Loki trying to take over the world. He's just grumpy." She was still watching Loki as she explained, he looked worse for wear and she knew he was withdrawing.

His movements were sloppy and frantic and sweat covered his face, she felt sorry for him but she knew tomorrow he would be okay or at least that's what the doctor had told her.

"Sounds like fun." Clint told her sarcastically and she shrugged before standing up to the bathroom.

Darcy was proud to say that after a week and a half of having a sling, she could do most things one handed so getting a plastic bowl from underneath the sink and filling it with cold water was not hard. Grabbing a small towel and dropping it in the water, she returned to the room to find Clint and Loki in a staring contest.

"Thor is taking you back to Asgard."

"I would love to see him try." Loki sneered and Darcy decided to end their little pissing contest.

"So me and Loki are watching a House marathon, you want to join us? I mean you can totally leave if you want to." She told him as she put the bowl on Loki's bedside table.

"Can't leave." Clint said miserably and Darcy gave him a smile as she made sure the towel was completely wet.

"Marvelous, now we can bond. Is it not marvelous Darcy?" Loki told her sarcastically, she nodded absentmindedly as she settled the towel on his forehead.

"Yes, it's awesome that we're all stuck here against our wills, completely hilarious."

Darcy ran the towel across his cheek and Loki made an involuntary sound of pleasure, Clint smothered a chuckle and Darcy sent him an ugly look.

"The hawk laughs for he knows not real pain." Loki murmured, eyes dropping closed.

Darcy continued to run the cool cloth across his face until he was completely asleep.

"You know, we've been here almost two weeks and not once has anyone attempted to give Loki a bath but..." The towel was completely clean and Loki didn't smell, Darcy had a brief moment of hate for him because _not fair._

"Gods." Clint shrugged and Darcy was inclined to agree.

Fucking gods.

* * *

"Darcy."

She closed her eyes and pretended to be sleeping.

"Darcy."

She didn't open her eyes.

"Darcy!"

"What?!"

"I wish to show you something." Loki was looking at her with an intense expression on his face, he twisted his face to signal her to get up and she begrudgingly did so, standing on the side of his bed.

"Are you still drugged up?" Darcy rubbed her face with her good hand and yawned.

"No, the haze from the midgardian drugs is gone." He hesitated before struggling against his metal restraints, Darcy waited in fascination as he broke his restraints.

"Ummm..."

"I am slowly regaining my magic and my strength, more rapidly now without the hindrance of the drugs." Loki sounded pleased and he stood up for the first time in two weeks.

Darcy stifled a laugh when he fully stood up and she was presented with his backside.

"Nice ass." She commented while he made his way to the bathroom.

"Thank you." He didn't even stumble at her words.

"You're not going to leave?" She asked him when he came out twenty minutes later, freshly shower and wearing the same hospital gown.

"No, not yet." He didn't elaborate while he walked the length of the room, trying to get some blood flowing.

"I assume you have destroy the devices in the room?" He flexed his arms and rubbed at his wrists.

"You mean the cameras? Yeah with the phone Tony gave me. You were covered in burns, what happened to those?"

"I am a god, I heal faster than any mortal ever could, however this is not the what I wished to show you." He sat on his bed and patted the space next to him.

"Oh what is it then?" She sat next to him, injured arm to his side.

Loki took a deep breath before he extended his arms in front of him, he stayed that way for a few minutes and Darcy started to get fidgety.

"What-" But she didn't get to finish when she started to notice the color of his skin change, a dark blue which she could barely make out in the darkness of the room.

It spread from the tip of his fingers to underneath his gown until it reached his face, the room felt colder and she shiver with sudden chills.

Loki turned to look at her and even in the darkness she could she see the red eyes staring back at her.

"Darcy-" Loki didn't get to finish because she had already pounced on him.

His lips were cold, colder than what she thought they would be but still soft, he opened his mouth and invited her in and she unhesitatingly accepted.

If his lips had been cold than his tongue was on fire, it didn't make sense but it felt wonderful, the cold of his skin and hotness of his mouth made her want to touch him everywhere.

She explored his skin, soft in some place, harder in others. His hair had ice on its ends and she played with it, breaking the ice apart and sending it to the floor, only for it to come back.

She only backed away from him when she started feeling dizzy, her injured arm was crushed between them though the cold coming from Loki's skin prevented it from hurting.

She tried to talk but realized her lips were numb, she slurred a couple of words before giving up and instead she just sat there looking up at him.

"Are you tongue tied, dear Darcy?" He murmured while he leaned to run the tip of his nose through her neck.

She tried to take again through the new tingling sensation on her neck but her lips would just not stop being numb, before she could try again a noise came from the hallway and Loki stopped his ministrations to focus on the noise.

"Time for bed." He whispered, giving her one last lingering kiss before he turned back to his regular pinkish hue.

She was weak at the knees but she managed to drag herself to her bed.

"Loki, next time we have make out session let's make sure to do it in the desert okay?"

* * *

Their babysitter was Captain America.

Steve Rogers was just what she expected he would be, well physically anyway.

"Ma'am, Steve Rogers." He shook her hand and Darcy raised her eyebrows in amusement.

"Oh? You get to be nice to the prisoner?"

Steve blushed and ducked his head but Darcy gave Loki a look of challenge.

Loki, pretending to still be tied to the bed, raised one eyebrow in question and Darcy glanced between him and Steve, who was now sitting between them in the uncomfortable chair all the Avengers seemed to be in love with.

Why none of them had thought to bring in a more comfortable chair was beyond her.

"You know Steve, me and Loki are always _eager_ to have company." She batted her eyelashes at him and Steve blushed a deeper shade of pink before clearing his throat.

"Indeed we do, games are always more fun with people around." Loki quipped.

"Of course we love to include as _many_ people as we can, the more the merrier I say." She playful slapped his arm and Steve tensed even more.

"Yes we especially love having people watch us while we copulate." Loki sent Steve a big smile but Steve looked stumped.

"Copulate?"

"Conjoin." Loki tried again but Steve still looked confused.

"Conjoin?"

"Fornicate, mate, connect, couple-"

"Sex." Darcy cut in.

"Fondue?!"

"Fondue?" Darcy and Loki both questioned at the same time, though Darcy was sure for two very different reasons.

"How?" Steve asked as his eyes jump from her to a bed bound Loki.

"Creatively." Darcy answered with a smirk and wiggle of her eyebrows.

"Indeed, it is more than a pleasure to be... creative with Darcy." Loki raised his hips in a suggestive manner and Darcy coughed to avoid laughing.

"Oh Loki, you're so sweet. How about you Steve? Are you sweet?" Darcy touched Steve's thigh and squeezed.

That seemed to be the breaking point for Steve, who stood up so fast Darcy though his feet might be on fire.

There was a moment of silence after Steve shut the door where Darcy didn't know whether to laugh or cry for poor Steve.

"You think Coulson will kill us for breaking his favorite superhero?"

"Perhaps. Darcy"

"Yeah?"

"What is fondue?"

"Oh Loki, I love that you ask the hard hitting questions."

* * *

"Mortal, it is purging day. You should have been prepared for this."

Loki was trying to convince their newest nurse that today was something called 'purging day', a day where apparently Loki got rid of his waste for the month. Darcy though the entire joke was beyond horrid but Loki had that gleeful look on his face and Darcy could see the nurse was breaking.

"Preparations should have been done many moons ago, purging day is the most celebrated day by my people how dare you ruin it?" Loki sneered at the nurse, who ran for the door with tears threatening to run down her face.

"Time."

"Almost five minutes, new record." It had becoming a thing for her to time how long it took him to break a new nurse, the longest being a veteran nurse who didn't take shit from anybody but who eventually cracked under the pressure of treating not only a prince but an alien prince over two thousands years old.

Loki didn't have time to gloat or feel happy about his new record because Thor and Jane walked in then.

"Ah Thor, we have been expecting you." Loki told him sarcastically, Darcy rolled her eyes in exasperation because she knew what was next.

Loki had been talking about it since he got off his meds and Darcy was both anxious and sad about it, Loki wanted to have a heart to heart with Thor before leaving.

"Brother!" Thor looked happy about Loki's words, she wondered how thick Thor was to not realized the hatred rolling off Loki's body, or maybe he chose not to see it.

"Darcy, it has been a true pleasure." Loki gave her what she hoped was a sincere smile before making his restraints disappeared.

She wasted no time in doing what Loki had told her to do once he was ready to leave, grabbing a shocked Jane on the way, she made her way quickly to the door and closed it behind her not before catching a glimpse of Loki in his full armor.

"BROTHER WHAT IS THE MEANING OF THIS?!"

The building shook underneath her and she felt a gush of wind coming from the room.

She was holding on to Jane, or maybe Jane was holding on to her, when the rest of the Avengers came in.

"Loki's gone." She said before any of them could ask her what happened.

After that she was taken to a conference room with Agent Coulson, for a series of debriefings and a physical examination to remove her sling.

Thor came back hours later, physically okay but eyes red.

Jane volunteered to take her to her apartment and once they were both sitting on Jane's couch sipping on grape juice in fancy wine glasses, Darcy let herself talk a little more about what happened with Loki, way more than what she had said during six hours of debriefings.

"You know what I regret the most though?" She polished off her grape juice and wished vainly that is real wine.

"What's that?" Jane had been compassionate and kind though Darcy knew she would have been consoling Thor had he not run off somewhere to be on his own for a while.

"Me and Loki didn't get to fondue, and that my friend is the real tragedy."

* * *

A couple days later she was ready to go back to New Mexico and she couldn't have been more glad.

The whole experience with Loki had been disturbing and surreal, but worth it.

She and Jane were at the airport when Tony caught up with them.

"Hacker two point oh, you're not leaving without telling me are you? because that's just rude." He poked her on the arm in mock reprimand, making her giggle.

"I'm going back to New Mexico." She stated while her flight was announced on the intercom.

"What? Why? You were suppose to come and work for me." Tony asked while giving her a completely baffled look.

"Yeah that's not happening, I'm going back to New Mexico because I'm going to law school."

"Law school?! But that's boring."

"I'm going to be a lawyer and SHIELD promised to forget about me as long as I don't hack into another government agency so..." She shrugged and gather her bag in her good hand, her left arm was better but still painful and hard to work with.

Tony was quiet for a second before he got a gleeful look on his face.

"Law school is like three years right? I can have you after?" He looked hopeful and Darcy shrugged again.

"Sure, maybe I can work in your legal department."

She gave Jane a hug and a kiss before slapping Tony on the shoulder and telling him to let it go, he was still pouting when she boarded her flight.

The stewardess guided her to a window seat in first class, courtesy of SHIELD, and she leaned back and closed her eyes.

"I could have just teleported us anywhere." Loki told her as he sat down on the seat next to her.

"Hush, I like flying." She leaned against his shoulder, eyes still closed.

"I still find it unnecessary."

"_Hush_ and maybe I'll tell you what fondue is."


	8. Porn Hour

Written for Incubigirl and her porn hour at tumblr.

* * *

Darcy was writing the report she should have done yesterday, Coulson was on her ass for not doing the reports how he wanted them but in her defense she wasn't even suppose to be helping Coulson.

She leaned back against the couch and closed her eyes in a brief moment of exhaustion, between helping Jane with her data and writing reports for Coulson, she was pretty sure death was near.

Her moment of peace was interrupted by the _click click_ of her laptop as Loki typed away.

"What are you doing?" She didn't open her eyes but the typing stalled for a second before picking up again.

"I am...researching midgardian technology and this invention called the internet."

Darcy opened her eyes to look at him, Loki was sitting on one of the circular stools, laptop on the kitchen island that separated the living room from the kitchen. She couldn't see the screen only his back but his back looked tense and this was very curious.

"What are you looking at then?" She stood up to stand next to him but Loki quickly closed the laptop and put a hand on it.

"It matters not." Loki flicked dust from the laptop and stared blankly at the refrigerator.

"Really? Because I would love to see what _matter not_ so much that you won't let me see." She put a hand on top of his to move it but he just took her hand in his and didn't let go, he turned to look at her and Darcy had a moment of surprise when she realized how clouded Loki's eyes were.

Loki's eyes only got that intense when...

"Oh my god. You're looking at porn aren't you? You discovered porn." Loki was turned on and she couldn't help the giggle that escape, because wouldn't it figure gods were just as horny as human guys?

Loki gave her an embarrassed look before trying to get up and leave, Darcy put a hand on his shoulder and made him stayed seated.

"Show me." Loki looked startled at her requests but opened the laptop back obediently.

"Oh my god, you discovered lesbian porn." She put a hand to her mouth to stop the laugh as the two girls on the screen continued to rub their naked bodies against each other.

"Do midgardian couples enjoyed witnessing this together? I was led to believe by the commentators on the moving images that it was suppose to be a secret...and only for men." Loki looked confused and she could only imagine what sort of comments Loki had read, it always bother her to know men thought women didn't like porn because that such a fucking lie.

"Girls like porn as much as guys and I have no problem with you looking at it, as long as I can look with you." She winked at him and Loki smirked.

It didn't take her long to realize Loki was going through a tumblr blog, something called 'porn hour' consuming most of the last two pages they had seen. All the pictures, gifs and videos were of a lesbian nature, Loki would tighten the arm he had around her waist every time something he really liked popped up on the screen.

"Have you looked at anything else? Straight porn?" She asked while they watched a girl on a couch pleasuring another girl with her hand, Loki seemed particularly fond of this one as he continued to watch the gifset with intense eyes as the arm around her waist got tighter by the second.

"Straight porn?" He wouldn't stop looking at the laptop's screen but Darcy found she had just as much trouble looking away from the girl who was spread wide as another girl behind her continued to rub her clit with her hand, the entire scene was probably based around two friends watching movies if the orange bowl filled with popcorn was anything to go by.

"A guy and a girl." When it came to porn standards Darcy actually found that kind of porn fairly boring, the wham-bam-thank-you-ma'am not as fulfilling as lesbian or gay porn but she had to ask in case Loki did like it and more options could be explored.

"No, I do not find it as...appealing." Loki scrolled down to a video, growing bored with the gifset, he clicked and they both waited while the video loaded.

"Yeah straight porn is kind of boring." The arm around her tensed and then relaxed again every few seconds, Darcy grabbed the hand on her waist and gave him a soft squeeze signaling for him to let her go. Loki did so reluctantly and she moved behind him and put her arms around his waist, putting her head next to his.

"You know when I was a freshman in college I met this girl." Loki tensed under her but continued to wait for the video to load. "She was this tiny little thing, she was like a barbie really. Huge blue eyes, strawberry blonde hair, she had curves in all the right places and I just wanted to lick her all over. Play the video Loki."

Loki did, though Darcy could see his hand was shaking when he pressed play.

There was a blonde girl in a blue dress on the bed, laying down, while another girl, a brunette, in a cream color dress began to move her hands across the blonde's breasts and stomach.

It was a powerful image, one that made her rub her thighs together in response.

"So anyway this girl becomes my friend, we hang out and talk about school and boys and whatever else. One day while were studying she tells how much she's always wanted a lesbian experience and then she asked me if I would do her the honor of licking her pussy." She starts to mimic the woman on the screen, rubbing Loki across his flat chest missing his nipples even when he leaned forward into her touch. Loki gave her a low growl and she bites his shoulder while she tries not to laugh at his responses.

She feels it then, a shift, Loki's green t shirt starts feeling fuller across the chest area and the shoulder she's still biting on becomes more slender, the waist she has her arms around becomes smaller until she's left with not a man but a woman.

She becomes even more turn on when Loki moves to face her and she realizes Loki is not only a woman but gorgeous woman, her boyfriend is a prettier woman than she is but instead of feeling insecure about it she only grows more wet with the knowledge that she's going to able to touch him this way.

"Continue Darcy." His voice is soft but persistent and she stares dizzily at his lips, which are a little fuller, wanting to kiss him and taste but Loki turns back to the laptop and she reluctantly continues to imitate the video and talk about her college wild days.

"I was nervous and excited, mostly because she was hot and she started blushing when I first touched one of her boobs, they were soft and perky and her nipples were this brown color that reminded me of sand." She touched his nipples then, Loki moaned, both his hands clinging to the counter top.

"I realized pretty early that I was going to take the lead, because I had barely kissed her and she was already a mess underneath me. So I took control and I kissed her mouth first, then her neck until she begged me to do something else. I touched and teased her nipples with my mouth and my hand while I started to touch her pussy." Loki was breathing hard now, all pretenses of control gone. Darcy stopped imitating the video and instead began dragging both of her hands underneath his shirt until she found his breasts, they felt so big and his nipples were so hard and she wanted to lick them and oh god the sounds he was making while she twisted them was heaven.

The video was almost done then but neither of them was paying attention anymore.

"She was so wet, so wet. I put my fingers on her clit and watched while she screamed." She was wet too and tired of the slow game they were playing but she refused to stop because Loki was never this desperate for her touch, never this close to begging her for pleasure.

She was going to keep the game going but Loki twisted around the chair and grabbed her lips with hers.

His mouth was hard and needy but soft in a way it hadn't been before, she was too distracted with his tongue to notice the hand sneaking inside her her cotton shorts until she felt the shock of pleasure when he touched her clit.

She screamed and let him go, Loki took the chance to stand before dragging them both to the floor.

She was naked then, the cool touch from the marble floor letting her know Loki had done a little hocus pocus to move things along.

"Wait, wait." She pushed him back until they were both sitting on the floor, breathing hard.

She wanted to see him, like a woman because she wasn't sure she would get the chance again.

Loki had always been the most attractive man she had ever met, if she could call him that, but the woman in front of her was a true goddess and Darcy grew giddy knowing she was going to hit that.

Loki rolled his eyes at her probably knowing what was going through her head.

Darcy wondered if this was the appropriate time to tell Loki about the box of toys underneath her bed.

"Maybe we should-" She didn't get to finish though because that the precise moment her cellphone rang and someone started knocking on their door.

"Lady Darcy I have come to fetch my brother." Thor's booming voice was like a bucket of cold water and she withered in disappointment because while Thor liked to bother them just for the sake of it, he only sounded that serious when their was trouble.

She was disappointed but Loki looked pissed, if there was something Loki hated more than not being able to rule the world it was someone interrupting their sexy times.

Loki kissed her one last time before standing up and reverting back to his male glory, clothes appearing on him while he walked to the door.

Darcy stood up slowly, uncomfortable with her reappearing wet panties but unwilling to show Thor what he had interrupted.

"Did someone perish?"

Thor looked confused at Loki's question but decided his brother was probably playing with him and instead told them there was a giant octopus eating boats.

"Very well." Loki gave a resigned sigh before turning back to her. "I shall be back and we will finish what we started."

Darcy couldn't help but give him a grin and wink before he left.

Thor stood dumbfounded for a second before Loki yelled his name from outside.

"Lady Darcy perhaps you would like to join the Lady Jane while you wait for my brother's return. I am told she shall be watching some of your midgardian moving pictures." Thor gave her an encouraging smile but Darcy could only remember the two women from the gifset.

"Maybe." Her horny mind was telling her weird things and she stood still until Thor gave her a pleased smile before leaving.

There was no way she was going to be able to get back to work, so instead she grabbed her laptop and made her way into her bedroom deciding that maybe creating a tumblr for her and Loki wouldn't be such a bad idea, at the very least they could do porn hour together.

Hours later when Loki came home, he would find her naked, a wide grin on her face and a box of sex toys spread around the bed.


	9. Mess

_**My angsty, bloody attempt to get rid of my writer's block.**_

_**(Contains mentions of abuse and blood will be spilled so please proceed with caution.)**_

* * *

It nagged at her, made her want to pace her room until she passed out from all the thinking her brain was doing.

It wasn't any good the way she let it go and just did it, she knew no other way though. No other alternative to fix what she knew was broken.

Because of that she didn't flinch when the hand on her shoulder traveled to her stomach, didn't react when the cold lips touched her skin and the teeth bit hard enough to draw blood.

She felt the lips twist into a smile as the blood started to trickle down her back, running down her leg until she realized the bite didn't hurt but burn.

Her silent scream was more habit than actual emotion and the hands on her were the only thing holding her up, she wanted to crumble, fall to the floor smeared in her own blood and cry. The cold hands on her naked body reminded her it wasn't that simple, that she couldn't run away.

The hands on her body were her reminder that she had failed and this was her punishment.

He dragged her to the bed and she let herself fall, uncaring of her blood dirtying an already soiled bed.

"Look at you. So gorgeous, my mortal." He cooed at her, slicking the hair back from her forehead.

"Thor will weep the day he finds your body, all used and soiled by me. It will be most glorious I assure you, Thor will try to avenge you and I will forever throw at his face that he could not save you. One of his most important mortals fallen in the hands of Loki." He gave her a wide smile and then slapped her when she didn't return it.

She was broken, torn up, all those things Loki told her she was and she was those things. All wrapped up in a little in a human body, a human body Loki loved to tortured.

She was only half surprised that she let him.

"It is the unspoken truth of humanity that you crave subjugation." He reminded her as he ran his lips down the swell of her breasts, biting and leaving marks all the way down.

She knew this part, had written this part, she knew her role in the play and spoke her lines with the same detachment she had when she had first met him.

"And subjugation will give us freedom."

"Freedom does not exist my mortal."

"Freedom is life's great lie. Once you accept that, in your heart..." The words felt wrong on her tongue but she paused to let him finish and with it her release.

"You will know peace." He finished the words on her own lips, whispering them against her. The taste of his lying tongue on the back her of throat, teasing her senses and her sanity.

It was over then, they had performed his play and like always it never changed though one day she knew it would, knew that instead of the golden apple left on her bedside table it would be a cleverly written note telling Thor where to find her lifeless body.

The day would come and she didn't mind.


End file.
